I am not sure what happened. With everything that happened with EV, I came out of it, pretty unscathed (minus some of my mental stability, which is still missing). I had the smallest c-section scar you have ever seen, my hair and skin was the best it had ever been and my energy level never faltered. Then along came the second kid and all went to hell in a handbasket. I was lucky in the sense that I never underwent postpartum depression (at least to the extreme that I saw my friends did). However, my waves of sadness came in the form of how I felt regarding my appearance, my overall stamina and returning to work. All these symptoms have been brand new to me as I never experienced them with EV.
My hair color does not seem to be staying for longer than 4 weeks and thankfully although I have thick hair, I seem to be shedding extensively and way more than I am comfortable with. I have switched shampoos and conditioners quite frequently, I have started taking prenatals again (fingers crossed), and I bought the largest bag you have ever see of velvet hair scrunchies from Amazon (apparently elastics and anything that can 'pull' the hair are a no go). Part of me, thinks I should just throw my hands up and just allow myself to let the gray grow out, but then the narcissistic side of me quickly hits the reasonable part of me over the head with a bat and hands it another box of hair dye.
edit: I ended up going to my hairdresser who practically had a coronary when I showed her this picture (left). Not only was she against me going gray AT ALL no matter how trendy it is, she emphasized the amount of work it would take and not to mention probably more hair loss to get me to the color needed to get me to that gray. After much deliberation, hemming and hawing and admitting she was right, I instead walked out of the salon with this (left). I once again have promised myself to never dye my hair myself again (I promise myself this more than I am comfortable to admit) and to just try to enjoy a hair color for longer than three weeks.
Next on the list is the pooch that is supposed to be a badge of honor, but one I am grappling with. Ohhh the mama pooch ::sigh::. I know I should be super proud of it and I am fully aware that it helped me deliver two amazing babies that I wouldn't trade the world for, but again the narcissistic side of me struggles to look at myself in the mirror and appreciate that extra flap. Seeing the protruding piece of skin has me feeling a certain way. I have taken to wearing flowy tops and/or posing a certain way so that it is not so apparent in pictures (black leggings that suck in for the win). I know I am petite and I can feel the scowls of all the women that commented how they couldn't believe how quickly my body bounced back, but sometimes regardless of what other's expectation are, you just cannot help feeling a certain way about yourself after having a baby.
Currently, my skin has finally leveled out due to my current albeit extensive skincare routine, but previous to this last month, my skin color seemed sallow, my skin was dry (I have always had normal/combo skin), and my pores became enlarged. What was I saying again about not having postpartum depression?
Okay, enough poor me and on to what has actually helped...
In order for me to feel like me again, my skincare routine was the first thing I felt I needed to get under control. I have had pretty much the same routine for the last several years, but somehow new postpartum Dana required a complete and utter upheaval. One that required a lot of testing and trial and error. I admit it though, I kind of love dabbling in this area because I love and adore skincare and trying new things. I have used First Aid Beauty for years, but for some reason the menthol drugstore smell it omits, bothers me so much now that I can't bear putting it on my face (I was using the face wash in the shower and the moisturizer for both night and morning). I am so saddened by this and hope it is only temporary. I also loved (cue really sad past tense) the Korres Greek Oatmeal Cleanser and although it is still alright and does its job that's about it. #whompwhomp. Another item that the smell bothers me now.
I have officially become one of those girls who has a two step cleansing process. This process although unnecessary for some, cleans my skin really well and gets off all the makeup and any grime that my skin has collected throughout the day. I bought this Biore Jelly Cleanser off of Ulta and it is amazing. it melts off all of my makeup like a dream and allows me to open my eyes so that I can massage everything off and it doesn't feel like it is just sitting on my face. I put it on dry skin, lightly wet my fingertips and rub it in, melting everything off (can I say the world melt enough..). I then splash lukewarm water on my face to remove all excess makeup and cleanser. When my face is free and clear of makeup (or looks like it is at least), I lightly pat my face dry with a washcloth, dampen my face again and use Fresh's Soy Cleanser as my second cleansing step. Repeat process above. I feel dumb explaining how to wash your face as you probably know how...
I hate how much I love this soy cleanser as it is pretty expensive at $38 (I wait for the VIB Rouge sale to get it at 20% off). However, I have learned as I have gotten older that spending money on skincare that works is sometimes a necessity. Highlights of this cleanser are; the smell doesn't bother me (it smells like fresh cucumbers), it doesn't sting my eyes and my face feels so clean when I am done that sometimes I forget the moisturizing step. I actually keep the Tula Face Purifying Cleanser in my shower (I received it in a FabFitFun box) and enjoy this a lot too as it doesn't burn my eyes and also cleans my skin really well. Again a little pricey, but it works as a one-step and I find that it is perfect for the shower..
I admit I am a sucker for facial oils and the best one I have found that has incorporated beautifully into my routine (well until the next skin calamity) is the Ordinary's 100% Cold-Pressed Moroccan Argan Oil. Technically, the argan oil could be used on it's own as it is very moisturizing, keeps my skin glowing, and has changed the texture of my skin altogether. I loved the Josie Maran Argan oil for years, but this is a fraction of the cost at $6.80 and honestly works just as nice! Kinda makes up for my $38 cleanser ::sigh::
i actually have a really bougie step here that I apologize for in advance. I use a handheld fan to dry down the oil a bit. That's right..a handheld fan...like the ones beauty YouTube gurus/Influencers or whatever they are called these days use. Side eye me all you want, but it works, plus I use them in Disney so they are a twofer and therefore I can say there is a method to my madness...right?! Go with it...anyway.. I guess you could do other things while you are waiting for the oil to dry down like laundry, making the bed, or getting the kids ready for school, but all those things seem so time-consuming and this does the job in about ten seconds.
Once it dries down a smidge (I still love a bit of oily glow) I go in with Austrian Gold Tinted Face Sunscreen, As mentioned, I live in Florida and therefore practically on the sun, so regardless of the weather, I never go outside without sunscreen. This step is a 100% necessary. If I had to forgo everything and keep one thing, this would be it and I firmly believe it is what has kept my skin looking the way it has for years. I like that it is tinted, has SPF of 50 but does not leave a white cast and honestly it can be used as a primer as it adheres to my foundation/BB/CC cream beautifully. I hate to say it, but this is another dry down step, but I normally do something else at this point like get my lunch together or brush my teeth and/or hair.
My makeup steps normally begin here, but for reference depending on my plans for the day, I will potentially add a primer. If I do, its the Nudestix Tinted blur Stick or the Maybelline Fit Blur Stick which is supposed to be a dupe, but honestly I don't think it is. I like the Nudestix more, but it is pricier for how quickly it gets used up. However, unlike the Maybelline option, the Nudestix can be a stand alone product. If I do not want to wear anything else on my face sans some lipgloss and mascara, this product is awesome. It literally does what it says and blurs, plus it looks great in photos, so bonus! I have officially given up on foundation altogether after being introduced to these next two products. The first is the Misha BB Cream which I have heard Jessica Braun (Jambeauty89) talk about for years and I do not know how she is not personally going to people's houses and forcing it into their hands and then there is the Lumene CC Cream which although a smidge lighter than I would prefer, can be warmed up quite easily with bronzer and it contains a lot of excellent ingredients in addition to sunscreen. It is not sold in a lot of stores, but I purchase mine on Target solely because it is an easy return for me if need be. Sidenote as I write this: I have noticed that is has jumped from $8 to $15 in a matter of four months so I might just stick to the Misha from now on since it is the same price and I do like it a little bit better for how it sits on my skin and it's a better shade match for my olive complexion.
These steps have honestly made such a difference in not only how my skin looks, but how I feel when I leave the house (even when I am in leggings and a baseball hat). I will have to get back to you regarding the hair chronicles once I get the hair loss under control. I swear I have used our vacuum more these last four months then I have since we purchased it last December. Thank you in advance Dyson mostly from my husband who was getting tired of picking up hairballs that we couldn't blame on an animal.
I would love to know what other postpartum mama's are doing for themselves or in regards to health and beauty just to get out of the "funk"?